Relationships Don’t Require Anger

As human beings, we are wired (from an evolutionary perspective) to respond to danger in our environment.

So yes, it will arise within us from time to time. 

But the ability to transmute that quickly is becoming easier and easier as we elevate in consciousness. 

You may feel you can no longer tolerate anger or you’re not available for it anymore. 

Is this a response to a dysregulated and overtaxed nervous system from a massively overstimulating world or is this a reflection of heightening consciousness and a true understanding of our spiritual nature?

I believe it can be a little of both. The difference is how you feel about it within. 

Is your heart beating faster and you feel unsure of where to go, what to do, and confused about what’s right? Or are you grounded in knowing that you choose love? That you choose peace? That you feel so much more comfortable settling into a deep connection to all that is?

Even if you need to regulate your breath for a moment to settle in, you return to the self, and allow the wisdom to come from source, and to come from soul, rather than the distraction of other people’s opinions, and the potentials you think exist in the field.

The fact is, we are distracted. We are distracted by other people’s perspectives, and we are distracted by other people’s reflections of the same thing we are processing.

It’s in the every day moments of transmutation that we grow, learn about our patterns, and become more present with who we actually are, what is important to us, and what we are here for. 

Release attachment to having to work through emotions together. You each get to take your own space to work through it individually, and then you can share upon reaching peace, if there is an area to communicate or create in life together. 

Of course there are scenarios where you react instead of respond. You’re human. Forgive yourself. 

Of course there are scenarios where processing it out loud gives you space to organize & clarify where you stand. This can be effective if the person receiving it is truly holding unconditional, non-judgmental, reflective space. However, it most often places your anger into the field of another. 

There are ways to release this that don’t involve others right in the heat of the moment. Invite others in following the peak of intensity so the coregulation brings you closer together rather than heightening tension in the space between you.

So many of us have been conditioned to connect through bitching, venting, complaining, and finding mutual ground in the disgust of another person or situation. What a sorrowful way to view, engage with, and experience humanity. 

We all have polarities we are facing and moving through on this planet. Let’s offer greater grace to ourselves and others as we more gently and compassionately navigate what’s being reflected to us in our interactions with others.

We are all love. We come from love and we are meant to share in, exchange, and expand the love on this planet.

Open sacred space to return to this vibration as often as possible. Don’t wait until a time of discord, illness, or upset to prioritize loving. It will pay exponential dividends for your vitality, intimacy, and confident clarity.